World Aids Day is a sad day...

 

...But we must have hope in the future

It’s important to keep raising awareness.

It’s important to challenge stigma and prejudice.

It’s important to try and prevent new transmissions.

 

We must also look forward in that new developments in treatments and testing will encourage more optimism for people living with HIV and more support for those who are still acquiring the virus every day.

I may be one of the 103,700 people currently living with HIV in the UK today but I consider myself to be a very fortunate person.There's not really anything in life I long for, or any way my health has deteriorated to such an extent that I cannot live a ’normal’ life,  but still on every World Aids Day I feel sad.

I don’t ever want to take for granted any of the wonderful people who are doing so much to challenge the sadness because they are much needed, much admired and much loved, but it’s still a sad day. It will always be sad day.

It’s sad that we have lost so many people and continue to lose people unnecessarily.

It’s sad that even though we are all working hard to make sure life carries on; it cannot carry on without restrictions.

It’s sad that every year we have to talk about a rise in new infections.

It’s sad that so many people around the world cannot get medicine.

It’s sad that so many who do have access to meds find it tough to cope with the side effects.

It’s sad because we still view  HIV+ people as if they are ‘plagued’ or morally bankrupt in some way.

It’s sad that we are so worried about ‘coming out’ as HIV positive for fear of rejection and judgement.

It’s sad that lives are changed forever because of a stupid virus.

It’s sad because you just cannot forget about this virus once it gets inside you.

It’s sad that we feel we have let down our loved ones because we contracted HIV.

It’s sad because it dominates so much of your life and makes you unable to understand your body in a rational way.

It’s sad because it messes with your mind and makes you think that everything that happens has relevance to your status.

It’s sad that it can turn you into a self-harming, self-loathing and destructive person.

It’s sad that you can never truly get back to the person you were before you became positive.

It’s sad that the word positive has such a negative connotation.

It’s sad that there are still so many of us who do not feel able to speak up about our lives and how they are affected.

It’s sad that those of us who do speak up feel so often defined by our status either by ourselves or by others.

It’s sad because we still only really talk about this in public one day a year.

It’s sad that I feel sad, but I can still talk about it and I can still raise awareness. 

 

It's important to remember World Aids Day and it's important to remember why.

 

 

 

Photograph above courtesy of Precinct Seager Galvez-Soto

  

Making YOUR  Mind Up

Use your right to vote PLEASE!

Of course many of us in the LGBT community are as confused and divided as the rest  of the country when it comes to deciding who to vote for in this year’s general election on May 7th.

However  the choice not to vote at all really isn’t one that we should let ourselves fall into the trap of making .  

Are we really so disillusioned by politics that we can’t hope for anything better or do we just not care at all and are fatalistic about the future to let whatever could happen, happen?

I’m not going to tell you who to vote for but I am pleading with you to vote. Then you can hold your elected leaders to account. If you don’t they just won’t hear our voices and will assume that everything is fine or that we just don’t care, or worse still, don’t exist.

Many people will say that LGBT issues are not the most important thing on their agenda but I have to ask why not? All issues affect us but we are the ones who must prioritize the lives and future wellbeing of lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people in our communities.

We’ve asked the politicians to vote for us over the last few years on issues such as the equal age of consent and equal marriage and now we must judge them on their track record and more importantly what they are pledging to do to support our communities over the next five years.

It has been warned by some that the biggest problem we face is LGBT apathy now many of the equalities battles have appeared to have been won but we often forget that these battles have took decades to win and some people would still prefer our rights to be ignored.

Most LGBT people don’t need anyone else to tell them how difficult life can be. Those of us who are young, old, unemployed, living with a serious health condition, disabled, BME or trans are even more troubled by the society we are living in and how it too often treats us.

The Equality Act 2010 made LGBT equality a priority for healthcare service providers, but since then there have been cuts to HIV prevention, sexual health work, mental health services, LGBT youth work, support for LGBT older people, ignorance of trans people’s needs and contempt for LGBT asylum seekers. We should all be demanding that whoever we vote for  will ensure that LGBT equality at home extends to fighting for and supporting LGBT people in other countries too.

The plight of homelessness among LGBT youth is particularly worrying with studies indicating that around 30% of homeless youth are LGBT.

 

Schools still remain frightening places for LGBT teachers and pupils. Many politicians have talked the talk when it comes to Sex and Relationship Education for primary and secondary school children but we need more than just words when our young people are affected by homophobic, biphobic, and transphobic bullying and all teachers in all schools need to support LGBT youth.

 

LGBT Hate Crime should also be treated more seriously and just as much as lesbians, gay men and bisexuals are right to expect equality we should expect the same for all our trans brothers and sisters.

 

The party leaders are all doing the rounds at the moment, even talking to the LGBT media because they really, really want our vote but who deserves it most?

 

Who do you really trust to deliver on behalf of lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people?

We don’t have long to make our minds up and there’s no point expecting the mainstream media to cover LGBT issues very much, if at all when covering these elections so take a look for yourself, read Diva, Attitude, Gay Times, Pink News, Gay Star News etc.  and come to your own conclusions… but please do make a decision, our futures depend on all of us voting!

Here are some of the main parties LGBT links to help us find out more:

http://www.lgbtlabour.org.uk/

http://www.lgbtory.co.uk/

http://lgbt.libdems.org.uk/en/

http://lgbtiq-greens.greenparty.org.uk/

https://www.partyof.wales/pride/

https://www.facebook.com/LGBT4Yes

https://www.facebook.com/UkipLgbt 

 

 

A Test of Character

I'm on to the subject of HIV Testing again and two things impressed me this week. Seeing a poster for National HIV Testing Week on a phone box in Manchester city centre (I know-they still exist!) and a really important article tucked away in the December issue of Attitude by Kristian Johns.

Now these days more of us are coming out of the HIV closet and more of us are getting tested so it stands to reason that there’s a lot more HIV to talk about than ever before.And so? 

I know ‘blah-blah’ another lecture but no it isn’t just about HIV Testing. It’s about trying to stay safe if you are HIV negative and trying to stay well if you are HIV positive, and of course I mean well in  every sense - Spirit, Body & Soul (wasn’t that a Nolan’s song?)

Anyway, there is so much  supposed awareness of HIV these days and so much talk about ‘complacency’  -you get it, you get your meds, you carry on and yes you do have to look at it like that if you are affected by HIV... but we all know it isn’t that bloody simple.

 

Trust me I’ve spent enough hours in gentlemen’s clubs of the homosexual variety to know it’s a lot of fun and bummery but in hindsight what’s really important is: 

a) sticking around long enough to move forward in life so you’re not thinking about HIV every day.

b) looking after yourself as what’s the point of dragging yourself even further downhill - nobody else is going to look after you.

Knowing your HIV status is either the greatest relief or the biggest shock but what it does do is give you a second chance.

A chance to think about your life and a chance to think about the way you are living it.

It is one thing you do have control over. How you deal with it is another matter entirely.

I know many people who say stoically that a positive diagnosis was the most important thing to happen to them in their entire life. On the other hand many are still struggling day in, day out to come to terms with their status, their self-esteem, rejection, other people’s prejudices and the sheer isolation of a lonely road travelled without direction.

It’s times like these when we need real friends and believe me it’s times like this when you find out who they really are.

Anyone is entitled to go off the rails when they get the news of a positive diagnosis but sooner or later you need to get yourself back on track and that’s so much easier with good friends around you to support you. It’s also vital to get the support that you need and make sure that you call those LGBT & HIV charities because you need them and believe it or not they need you too.

If you’ve never tested before or haven’t tested for a while, it’s important to remember that it’s really easy to test and the benefits of knowing your HIV status far outweigh the ‘ignorance is bliss’ philosophy.

Time to face up to the facts and start living our lives, not regretting past decisions or worrying about the future.

Do what you need to do to keep yourself sane and sanguine and get what help you need to move forward.

Taking personal responsibility for reducing onward transmission of HIV by taking an HIV test is the message for National HIV Testing Week but of course this is only the very beginning of our discussion about HIV. Soon World Aids Day will be upon us and we’ll have to deal yet again with more ‘shocking’ statistics about HIV transmission in the gay community.

Don’t let these statistics get you down, it is not inevitable that you are going to get HIV and if you do some of the most beautiful men I know are HIV positive and there is so much love and support out there for you.

Let’s keep talking and lend a hand to everyone out there who is campaigning for more understanding about how HIV affects all our lives. We really need to support one another.

www.facebook.com/NationalHivTestingWeek

www.tht.org.uk/itstartswithme

www.lgf.org.uk/get-support/for-men/

www.gmfa.org.uk/Sites/fsmagazine

 

GAY MEN & CANCER - BE PREPARED!

 

 

Haven’t posted anything in ages as I have spent much of the last few months working (with others) on ways to provide more information on Male Cancers to gay and bisexual men so this is the reason for the update now.

In our lives we are all going to be affected by cancer, no escape, no special privileges. Please don’t think Cancer only happens as we get older .All of us have been saddened by the death of  Stephen Sutton recently whose story taught us that cancer can happen to anyone at any age.

Cancer affects everyone but as a gay or bisexual man, cancer is going to affect you statistically more than HIV, we just don’t know how to talk about it.

I’ve spoken previously about Prostate Cancer and thankfully there are a lot more out gay men speaking up now. Please take a look at this fantastic piece from Nick Wright of Prostate Cancer UK about Jim Peter’s blog:  ‘No, not all men affected by prostate cancer are straight and no, my wife will not be picking me up after treatment’.

 The wider issue remains the distinct lack of understanding that some of us just aren’t heterosexual no matter how hard we’ve tried to be (Ok, perhaps we haven’t really tried that hard).

Recently I’ve been hearing encouraging news from organisations such as Beating Bowel Cancer and Cancer Research UK about how they too would like to improve information for gay and bisexual men just as Prostate Cancer have done.

 Because there is  a distinct shortage of information related to cancer and men who have sex with men the Health & Wellbeing Service from Manchester Mental Health and SocialCare Trust (NHS) in partnership with The Lesbian & Gay Foundation have funded a brand new resource for gay and bisexual men that will be out in mid-August 2014.

 

 

 

So things are starting to happen, and not before time.

Community surveys suggest that gay men in general drink and smoke more than straight men, putting us at greater risk of developing health problems.

This means that there is a need for us to become more aware of our risks of health issues such as cancer, and be more open about discussing our sexual orientation with health professionals.

A gay and bisexual man’s introduction to Male Cancers  will cover: Sex, Sexual Health, HIV& Cancer ,Anal Cancer, Bowel Cancer, Male Breast Cancer ,Prostate Cancer, Penile Cancer & Testicular Cancer and includes men’s voices and useful contacts to further information and support.

So what can we all do today?

Be informed. Lung cancer is the most common cause of cancer deaths in males accounting for almost one in four of all male cancer deaths. The next most common causes of cancer death in men are prostate and bowel cancers. These three cancers - lung, prostate and bowel - together account for almost half of all male cancer deaths. Bladder, kidney and stomach cancers are also among the top ten most common causes of cancer deaths in males.

So please if you are reading this, don’t be frightened, be informed. Make sure you look after your health, cut down the fags, go easy on the booze, exercise more and eat healthier and get to know more about what cancer is and how it affects us all. Look out for any changes in your body and speak to your GP.

Oh and follow these organisations too:

www.macmillan.org.uk

www.orchid-cancer.org.uk

www.everyman-campaign.org/

http://www.teenagecancertrust.org

 

HMD 2014 & LGB&T Journeys

 

For much of the last 14 years I’ve been involved in events to tie in LGB&T issues with Holocaust Memorial Day and I don’t think it could be more relevant today to keep doing so, what with mass executions in the middle east and rampant homophobia in the east of Europe, Africa, Asia and just about everywhere else on earth. You could be forgiven for  thinking that human beings are just a savage species that  have never learned to truly accept and love one another, but still we all must try to see hope in everyone.

This year I spent a lot of time trying to find something of interest to coincide with the UK official HMD theme of Journeys which has been hard when there isn’t a vast amount of material around relating to an LGB&T audience that most interested people haven’t already seen.

As we watch in horror on the news every night at ongoing developments in Syria, Egypt, Central Africa, Sudan, Ukraine and we worry about what will happen in Russia, Uganda and India to name just a few places currently facing dark days, it seems appropriate to look back on a progressive country like Germany and to a time before the Holocaust when many would have thought we were becoming more liberal, but how wrong could we have been if we had been alive over 100 years ago.  

The First LGBT Activist by Germany’s Pioneer of Queer Cinema

One person I have been drawn too is Rosa von Praunheim, Germany's, Maverick, gay German filmmaker, who has for many years been sharing interesting stories of LGB&T journeys over the last century.

Born in 1942 as Holger Mischwitzky, the director adopted "Rosa" for both gender ambiguity and as a reminder of the pink triangle (Rosa Winkel) that gays were forced to wear in concentration camps. Two years after the Stonewall riots, his first feature caused a furor in Germany but also led to the foundation of the modern German gay liberation movement. Since then Von Praunheim  has dealt with many issues, including the AIDS crisis, in a career of over 70 films and is still considered the most popular (and in turns the most unpopular!) filmmaker in Germany today, even in his seventies.

One of the film’s being shown this week at The Lesbian &Gay Foundation in Manchester to coincide with Holocaust Memorial Day 2014 is ‘The Einstein of Sex’. The film’s title is in reference to its subject Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld, a German Jew whose pioneer studies in human sexuality in the late 19^th and early 20^th century were abruptly halted when the Nazis took power.

The film shows attitudes towards human sexuality at the end of the 19th century. Human subjects under scrutiny are treated abominably, and homosexuals are especially mistreated. German law (specifically Paragraph 175) stated that homosexuality was illegal, and Hirschfeld’s goal was to have the law repealed. If you need any more recommendation than checkout what PeterTatchell had to say about the film at the time of its original release over a decade ago.

Not a film you can see on Netflix, iTunes or easily get from Amazon yet the film is available in German with English subtitles from the Rosa Von Praunheim official site

I’m A Ho-Mo, Care to Join Me?

 

 

The older I get the more attracted I am to the hirsute male.

How I’m 'maturing' in this area I don’t  quite know but now there’s a great reason to go public and come out in support of boys that bristle.That is to join everyone who raises awareness of Prostate Cancer (and other male cancers).

We also need to raise funds to help inform guys about how a man's life can be devastated by such health matters and to provide information resources that are inclusive of the needs of gay and bisexual men.

To make sure that those who work in this area get the support they need to keep helping  men affected by cancer (who need every bit of support and encouragement we can give to them) there are some fantastic initiatives out there. 

Movember  is perhaps the most famous men's cancer fundraiser and they have some wonderful ideas  on how to get people motivated and have fun raising awareness and much needed cash to support related good causes during November.

Prostate Cancer UK is a charity that is there for men all year round and they currently want to know how prostate cancer affects men and their partners too. Also they want to make sure that gay and bisexual men know that their services exist for them too.

 

Many organisations  are starting to realise that  they need to be more aware of the needs of different groups of men but at the moment there simply is not enough information for gay and bisexual men on how issues such as Prostate Cancer affect them personally.

 

Out With Prostate Cancer is the UK’s first support and social group for gay and bi men affected by Prostate and other related cancers and I urge you to check them out. They really are  are a great bunch of guys.

 

Now you might think that there’s no need for separate info for us gays and although I don't want  to take away anything from the fantastic work done by Cancer charities up and down the country, us Homo’s have to prioritise our own needs.

If you’re a guy who likes guys then you are more likely than a heterosexual guy to find out that one day, you or your partner will develop issues with your Prostate, even if this doesn’t go on to become Prostate Cancer .

The problem is that so many Male Cancers from Prostate to Bowel, to Anal, to Testicular  can affect your personal life,relationships and of course your sexual health and sex life so guys need to be able to know who to talk to, how to get the right information that meets their needs, where to get checked up, who provides the best and most appropriate support and  how to find the best treatments when we need them.

Much of the information available at the moment is aimed at heterosexual men, as are  the support groups and gay and bisexual guys really do need someone to talk to who understands what they are going through as men who are having their own difficulties coming to terms with life before during and after cancer.

It's tough for anyone having to go through this but when your consultant, GP, nurse, cancer specialist whoever, just doesn't know how to talk to you as a non-heterosexual man then where do you go to to find the information you need? Where is the information to find out how surviving cancer will affect you as a gay/bi guy?

You want to talk with other gay and bisexual men and you need to find out how other gay and bisexual men have coped/are coping, and  living with these health issues when their relationships and sex lives have had to change because of how cancer, treatment, medications and surgery have affected their lives.

Currently there just isn't enough of this specific information around but we know that a lot of guys really need it and they need it today.

That’s why I’m braving face and preparing to Grow a ‘Ho-Mo’ for November to help raise funds so that The Lesbian & Gay Foundation can provide information and support to gay and bisexual men who  just need to talk to other gay and bi guys about this issue.

We need to share knowledge on how some cancers affect gay and bisexual men differently and to prioritise the support networks available to gay and bisexual guys.

Now I’m prepared to look like  a reject from Village People auditions but that's nothing compared to what men dealing with Prostate Cancer have to go through.

Please support the following cause if you can or why not join in and we can get all Fuzzy together? It could open up a new Ho-Mo world for  all of us!

 http://www.justgiving.com/Andrew-Gilliver

 

 

The Bear that Tore the Rainbow.

Terrible things are happening in Russia

To our LGBT friends, and to gay people who visit the country.But how can we make our voices heard and hope to influence change for people in a place that is so different from Western Europe, where citizens face oppression everywhere they turn?

Truth is I don’t know but I do want to find out.

 

I visited St. Petersburg ten years ago which itself is a fascinating city but one that I didn’t feel entirely comfortable in if I’m honest, even as the most European of Russian cities (as the tourist brochures would tell you).

 

After seeing the amazing sights of the vast Palace Square, the famous Church of our Saviour of the Spilled Blood (sadly ironic given the current state of affairs), the statue of Peter the Great, the Winter Palace and much gilded history, you walk around the city and see life as it really is.The broken down trams were left to rust in the street, the suspicion on people’s faces unnerves you and you know you are no longer in Europe.

We were advised to carry our passports at all times and the soldiers posted throughout the city may be handsome but I wouldn’t want to stare at them for too long.

 

At the time I remember citizens in Russia wanting to form closer links to develop support for local LGBT people and it was hoped that this would develop as the situation for gay people improved over the coming decade. Although male homosexual acts were decriminalized in 1993,today there are still no laws protecting against discrimination or harassment on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. Now we actually have anti-gay laws that in effect ban references to homosexuality in any way.

In 2009 that festival of the gays, Eurovision was held in Moscow on the same day as Moscow Pride which you would think would be a marketing dream for any city wanting to capitalise on its ‘European’ aspirations but alas this was not to be. Moscow police violently dispersed a gay pride rally that was banned by city authorities, leading to further bans for the next century. No cute bread baking singing grannies will ever undo this fact from my mind.

2012 marked the 50th anniversary of the Manchester/ St Petersburg sister city arrangement. Now some people may think we should cut our ties with the city but I don’t agree.

 Manchester Pride-goers were urged to send a message of solidarity to gay people in our sister city of St Petersburg. Leaflets and flags were given to the spectators at Saturday's Manchester Pride parade and a special banner, carrying a message of solidarity for LGBT people in St Petersburg, was carried through the city streets.

Meanwhile, one of Russia's leading LGBT activists attended Manchester Pride to share her experiences of living in St Petersburg. Polina Savchenko is one of the directors of Coming Out, a St Petersburg-based LGBT group  which provides vital support to gay people in the city and lobbies for LGBT rights. I was fortunate to meet her and ask how gay people here can help gay people there.

Now the situation in Russia is getting worse. An anti-gay 'propaganda' bill has just been signed into law. More murder and violent attacks of LGBT people are being reported.

With the Winter Olympics in Sochi fast approaching, Putin doesn’t seem to care about Russia's international reputation, merely stating that any gay athletes or tourists will be safe if they visit (during the Olympics).

Today Russian people struggling against the anti-gay crackdown are calling for help. They need a massive global outcry and media attention. I'm not seeing this on the mainstream news,are you?

I understand the reaction of people wanting to ban everything Russian and  not take part in any events that Russia hosts but could this really change anything?

Should we Boycott the 2014 Winter Olympics, or use the event as an opportunity to publicly shame Russia on a global scale?  Surely if there are less countries to take part in the Winter Olympics that’s less voices to be heard and more medals up for grabs by Russians!

And what about the rest of us that don’t want to visit Russia?

Ok so we avoid Russian exports such as Vodka but although that may make us feel like we are doing something, it doesn’t really hit the Russian lawmakers or Vladimir Putin  as much of the stuff isn’t even produced or manufactured in Russia although I admit it does get some publicity. 

I for one think it’s important to listen what LGBT Russians themselves want us to do and the message has come through loud and clear that we must use every opportunity to raise awareness of this issue.

 

I think we must all do our bit in whatever way we think will work, but we should think about what can have the greatest effect on the law makers and misguided politicians who feel that cracking down hard on the gay community will win them popular support (A 2013 survey found that 74% of Russians said homosexuality should not be accepted by society).Of course this was an effective policy in Nazi Germany but it didn’t mean that it was right.

We must challenge our elected officials to do everything they can to raise this matter and not let it go until the outcome is brighter for our Russian brothers and sisters.

The UK Government pledged 2 years ago to use political dialogue with other countries to push for the recognition of LGB&T rights and advocate for changes to discriminatory practices and laws which criminalise homosexuality and same sex behaviour. What is it doing about this situation in Russia?

The United Nations human rights office has launched its first global outreach campaign to promote tolerance and greater equality for lesbians, gays, transgender people and bisexuals.Called Free & Equal, it's an unprecedented effort by the Office of the U.N. High Commissioner for Human Rights to change public attitudes around the world on issues that have bitterly divided the U.N.'s own member states. Can this mean anything to Putin?

I have met and talked to several LGBT Russians in the last year and anyone calling Coming Out  St Petersburg would get exactly the same kind of warm friendly response you would receive at The Lesbian & Gay Foundation.

The difference is that they are trying to support their communities in incredibly difficult times. Surely if we are fortunate to live in a country that finally has awarded us many of the equal rights that we have so long fought for, now is the time to support those people who are just like us, but just so happen to live thousands of miles away in a vast country where an angry bear is flexing his ageing muscles once again. No-one should be impressed by him.But the fear still exists.

Checkout All Out’s petition: https://www.allout.org/en/actions/russia-attacks